It is snowing outside. It was flurry-ing when I left the house to return DVDs to Blockbuster (a side digression about Blockbuster...in the late 90's there was a Second City show that described Blockbuster in the same way that lots of people regard Starbucks-an example of a corporate monolith that has shut off the oxygen for lots of more worthy, independent, etc. etc. And the sketch had one character asking audience members to come forward and give up their blockbuster cards to be sliced in half, much like a tent revival's "Altar Call" where people come forward to declare that yes, in fact, they have recieved the message. And it's true, Blockbuster carries all sorts of shit and the "Special Interest" section is a sad, sad section indeed despite the inclusion of THE EYES OF TAMMYE FAYE and even though the location to which I was returning said videos said that not only did they not have the DVD of THE OFFICE but that they had no intentions whatsoever of purchasing said DVD this is the thing-it is right next to the Whole Foods (don't get me started) and, further, there are Blockbusters near where I work, where I live, where I go to school, where I take a hip hop class, where I do pretty much everygoddamn thing in my life. You know where there is an excellent video store? One 30 minute train ride and a 15 minute walk-and reverse that for the trip home. Another one? A 40 minute train ride and a 20 minute walk. Are they independent? Fiercely. Better selection, more to my liking? You bet. Forced employees to wear ill-fitting t-shirts advertising the impending release of MY BIG FAT GREEK WEDDING? Of course not. Hey, I bought a fucking copy of STYLE WARS because theoretically-more-desirable-store-one said, "uh yeah, somebody seems to have, uh, stole that". Of course I prefer the non-chain video stores in theory but, like all y'all I don't live in theory. Where I live, there is a Blockbuster RIGHT THERE) and to get a haircut.

I got my haircut at Big Hair, and by the owner at that (they have instituted a sign-in system at Big Hair meaning that you need not sit inside to claim your spot in line but instead can trek around the corner to the various vintage clothing stores) and had a conversation with the owner/stylist about late 80's music in which she was impressed that I knew who The Lords Of The New Church was and said "it was great talking with you!" after the haircut which was like winning a little prize.

after all that, well the snow got really intense. REALLY intense. The last time I remember it snowing like this was on New Year's Day 1999 when it snowed so hard, so fast, that the ground was dry in the morning and up to my kneecaps at 7 p.m.

So I'm at home, eating steamed broccoli and leftover pizza and checking email. I subscribe to a few listservs who make it their mission to send me lots of porn every day. Thank you listservs. Okay, here's a question. Why in the world did the convention develop in gay, male pornography to have a guy licking his own bicep. I rather like biceps and wouldn't mind having my own although I have zero interest in developing them (Implants? I could do that. And while I will do the ab exercises associated with my hip-hop class, it is because instructor Boogie has made it clear that the stronger my abs, the better my ability to do the crazy-ass things she requests. Boogie has, thusfar, expressed no interest in my biceps and there we are) and while I like them on a fella, I don't much care if they are there are not and certainly don't wish I was licking them.

Being a subscriber to such images, I do get a fair number of photographs of gentlemen who are both limber enough and sufficiently well-endowed to allow them to fellate themselves. Hey, I get that. It's like the joke-why do dogs lick themselves? Because they can. But dogs don't lick their legs, unless they have fleas. I've never yearned to lick some guy's arms, no matter how well developed. And, further, while I might wish that, say, my nipples be fiddled with in sex, I never thought, "man, I sure wish there was a hottie tonguing my bicep, such as it is".

So what is up with these young, fit gentlemen licking their own upper arms?